It seemed like a good plan at the time.
The thing is that in spite of how unstable I was at that point I would sometimes have what can only be described as fits of lucidity. During such a fit I am actually capable of rational thought and can sometimes approach the world from a perspective mostly unaffected by the chemicals which exert their power over my life with so much strength. I happened to have one such fit three days after venturing out into the dangerous world of Whole Foods. It was at this point that I became disgusted with the faint-hearted fearful fool I had become over the past week or so.
I remember distinctly thinking to myself that I had started the gears of this machine and I would either be the one to stop them, or they would stop me. One way or another this was going to end. I could only hide for so long, before someone tracked me down and found my place. And as far as hideouts are concerned I'd certainly chosen a very poor place to barricade myself. So my options were either to hide like a stupid trapped animal waiting for my executioners to come to me, or maybe I could make it difficult for them.
I really didn't expect to make it. After all how the hell is an aerospace engineering grad student supposed to make it against professional killers. I don't think my knowledge of the Navier-Stokes equations will at all come in handy when trying to avoid getting whacked by a trained and practiced killer. At that moment in time I really thought that there was no way I had a chance to make it out alive. (Please understand that as I jot down these chapters while on the run, my perspective has changed a bit. But I'm trying, as much as possible, to write these entries as though they were journal entries from that point in time. I'm trying to give you the story from my perspective as it happened, that way if/when my writing catches up to present time I can just keep writing journal entries)
So, at that point in time, I decided that if I was the prey I might as well make the hunt interesting. It made sense, make the hunter try for it, challenge the hunter a little.
So I developed a plan to disappear. I already avoided the public eye as much as possible. The media had all but given up on figuring out where that rich Kremer boy was and what he was doing with his life. I had done a good enough job of avoiding and frustrating them I think they lost interest. So my only real connections to anything were to my studies, my doctors and my places of residence. So if I went on the run, and quit school I might be more difficult prey to find. This also meant that I'd have to give up on the supposed treatment I was receiving at the campus mental health clinic from the psychiatrists they employed there.
So now I just needed to go to campus to take care of the wild goose chase I was sure they'd send me on in order to withdraw my registration prior to the new semester. Then cancel my appointments with the mental health center, and that would be it, I could run. Sounded simple enough.
Just hop in the car, use the key to ignite the fuel, which would allow the car to provide transportation for me to get to campus and subsequently use said key to lock said car and use my God-given foot-mobile to visit any number of offices to get this done. Should've been simple.
This time it wasn't quite that easy. My head did that same pin-ball motion cataloging every face on the drive to campus, every pedestrian, every motorist, every suspect. Hell, I even remember this stupid looking beagle that stared at me in a very suspect fashion. However, I managed once again to reach my destination without any recollection of looking at the road. Things didn't get weird until I visited the third of many offices on campus, to get the signature of one Dr. Green. In order to withdraw I need to get authorization from my advisor, and given that he and I had been discussing my future and hinting at taking a break from research I knew I wouldn't meet with much resistance. The surprise came when he said my cousin had been by looking for me.
"Your cousin Eric was here earlier today and asked me if I could help him get back in touch with you. Said he didn't want to drag me into any of the old family business, but that he hadn't talked to you in years and had a devil of a time just finding out that you worked for me. I told him he could check your office and the labs, but that I didn't know where you lived. I hope that's alright, I really tried not to overstep my bounds. With family matters it's hard to know where the line is," explained Dr. Green.
"No worries, you're fine Dr. Green. I have no idea why he'd want to see me after all these years. But if it's that important I'm sure he'll be waiting for me at my office. However, I'd like to ask you not to mention anything to anyone that might ask for me in the future. I know you were just trying to help, but it would be best if you stayed out of all this." I said. "Especially since I don't have a cousin Eric." I thought to myself.
So this was it. The first person to come after me. Whoever this guy was, and I'm sure his name wasn't Eric, it had taken him about seven days to get the information from the guy in prison. Pretty quick I guess. But this jerk clearly wasn't the cream of the crop when it comes to hitmen. He was looking for me in a very public fashion. I guess his plan was to get to me fast, and he wasn't worried about being discreet about it. Fairly stupid plan, but I'm sure he knew he wasn't the best at this type of thing, so he had to get to me before any of the guys who really are good at this to have a chance at the prize. So maybe it wasn't that bad of a plan after all, considering that possibility.
On my way out of the building I had to pass the hall where my office was located. On my way in I didn't realize I could actually be walking past the first person to make an attempt on my life. At least not with any real rationality, I had of course in my typical delusional fashion been cataloging the face of every person as a suspect. But I hadn't peeked down that hall.
When I got to the hall I walked in a fashion that felt as casual as I could walk, but I'm sure wasn't. Then I looked down the hall towards my office in a fashion that felt as casual as I could look down a hall, and I saw him. "Eric." Waiting in front of my office, impatiently. He was checking his watch, like he had to be somewhere in the near future and was wondering how much longer he could wait before he'd have to call it a day and try again later. Because of this watch checking, he didn't see me pass, or at least he didn't look my direction while I was simultaneously looking his direction.
I had a few more stops on campus before I was done, a couple more signatures to get, then I needed to drop off the papers, and swing by the clinic. I carefully considered getting away from campus (very far away) as soon as I could (meaning run full speed to my car and pushing the pedal to the metal). But I realized that for the moment I had the advantage, I knew where Eric was, and I didn't need to visit that building again. However, if I waited for another day to finish this business on campus he might ask around and figure out that I needed to submit some papers, and where I needed to submit them. Then the advantage would be his.
So I hurried. I tried to hurry casually, "Just look like someone who has important things to do and limited time to do them in," I told myself. I highly doubt I looked like anything less than someone who knew a killer was after them, but maybe my acting was better than I give myself credit for. I got a few odd looks from people as I brushed their shoulders as hurried people do, but nothing more than that. I finished all the errands on campus in about half the time I would've expected it to take, now just to get back to my car and I'd be free to run.
Unfortunately my car was parked in the wonderfully titled Main Lot. You'd think people smart enough to be at M.I.T. could name things better than that, but no. I needed to go to the Main Lot, the lot closest to the Aerospace Engineering building, and that of course was the last known location of "Eric." So I knew there was a possibility that I'd run into him there, especially if he'd finally decided he didn't have the time to wait anymore. I got into the lot and was pulling my keys out of my pocket when I learned that "Eric" had in fact decided his other tasks for the day were more important than waiting in that hallway.
First I heard the hard footsteps of someone running towards me in shoes that were definitely not made for running. I quickly peeked over my shoulder trying not to panic, and trying to still focus on getting my keys out while I looked back to see "Eric" approaching with haste. He didn't seem to be brandishing any weapon, so maybe his intent was to capture me first, then kill me. Regardless of the intricacies of his intents, I knew what the end-game was for him, and I didn't like that plan much. I tried to get to my car faster than he got to me. "Eric" was apparently in better runner than I was, because he caught me with a strong blow to the back of my head just before I got close enough to try to put the key in the door.
Fortunately the blow came just as I turned to get my body in position to put said key in said door, so although I think I still took the brunt of the blow it glanced off and certainly could have been worse. This was the first time in my life I ever regretted locking my car doors. It was a good habit I developed because in general I don't trust the general public, no matter how nice of a neighborhood I'm in. However, at this moment in time, having locked my door only meant there were additional steps between me and getting in my car and escaping.
I quickly decided that getting in the car was not an option right now. I also knew that since he had hit me, I could legally beat the hell out of this man and claim self-defense. I turned in such a way that as soon as I located his body I'd put my full body weight behind a punch. I was able stick him with a pretty solid blow to the gut. I think I may have knocked the wind out of him, cause he didn't put up much of a defense against the follow-up combo of a jab and a right hook. As I planted my right hook on his left cheek I realized that if I beat up "Eric" here and there were witnesses I'd have to talk to cops, and I wouldn't be able to run. I didn't like that plan. So I bolted.
I ran away from "Eric" which also meant running away from my car, which I didn't like either, but I need to develop a plan. I tried to do so on the run, but this wasn't my strong suit. Ask me to design an experiment to test the relative strength of different weaving patterns of carbon fiber fabric under impact loading and I'll have that done in five minutes. But ask me how to get away from someone who is trying to kill me, while ideally not leaving them the ability to follow me and also allowing myself to get away without having to speak with authorities...
I was completely at a loss, and I was running across the lot like a madman with a madman on my tail, because I was both of those things. I bolted through Pratt School towards Massachusetts Ave knowing that if I got across the street and past Bexley Hall I could head toward the Student Center and the Fitness Center, both of which would provide good places to hide. However, "Eric" caught up to me again just as I was getting close to Massachusetts, and "Eric" was pissed. He caught my right side with a strong right hook, and used his left hand to turn me back towards him. I got my arms up just fast enough to block a right to the face. Then I jabbed at him but it didn't do much good. He ducked under my jab and tackled me to the ground. However, he must have hit his head on the newspaper stand or something, because there was an awful sound and his grip loosened enough for me to get out from under him. I ran along Massachusetts towards to Student Center and watched for my chance to bolt across the street. He was quick to his feet though, so maybe he hadn't hit his head after all.
I can only imagine that "Eric" was only focused on me because of what happened next. I saw a gap in traffic that suited my intents just fine. It was one of those gaps in traffic where the cars in each lane of the street were staggered perfectly such that just as I was about through one lane the next lane would be clear. The traffic also meant it would be near impossible for "Eric" to cross at the same time as me. I had to risk it even though negotiating this staggered traffic was probably the biggest risk of my life to date. I never made it past the middle of the street. I didn't have to.
I heard the collision before I knew what had happened. I couldn't stop running until I got to the middle of the road or I would be hit. But as I turned to see what happened upon reaching the middle of the road I saw that "Eric" had jumped into traffic behind me, and had not been fast enough. All the cars on the road had screeched to a halt and people were already on cell phones calling 911. I had to stay, there were too many witnesses for me to consider running.
"Eric" was dead on arrival, or at least that's what I overheard when the EMT's walked by me. All I could think was that this would mean my name in the media again. Not just that, but also that someone had been trying to kill me. This was about as bad as this could have gone. Or maybe it wasn't, after all I could've been killed, or I could've been the one who got hit.
But wait I wanted to die, right? I asked for this, didn't I? Why was I resisting? I needed to get away, I needed time to think. But first I had a lot of questions to answer for the cops. I didn't know a lot of the answers, like "Who was the guy after me?" Others I couldn't answer truthfully, like "Is there any reason he would be after you? Do you know why he might try to do this to you?"
Those conversations are all very hazy in my memory, because my mind was elsewhere, humming with too many thoughts of my own. I know I answered all their questions, and didn't raise any suspicion that there might be a contract out on me. They concluded that it must have been a mugging gone wrong, and left it at that.
Then I was able to get away. I went back to my car and drove until I was too tired for it to be safe for me to be behind the wheel. Then I drove about an hour more, only to finally give in and stop at a hotel on the side of the freeway.
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